“No one can possibly know what is about to happen; it is happening, each time, for the first time, for the only time.”
-James Baldwin
Awkwardness, confusion, embarrassment, discomforts, uneasiness – all these fragments of emotions glimpse in front of your eyes within those precious moments while you try to communicate with someone special initially. Our conscious mind catches on the first time impression. You never want to sound cliché. Upfront verbal communication sets the tone for an impeccable foundation for the would-be relationship. While you want to make your foremost meeting worth remembering, you must want to know about the new person also. You may think about the vibes that person brings along and should he/she be right for you or not? all these perplexities would pass as both of you engage in an intimate verbal conversation.
As, you try to be innovative and at the same time, be entertaining, you also need to be believable and seem to be a trustworthy person to your date. You should avoid those typical questions like, “where are you from?”, “where do you work?”, “Which one is your favorite color?” etc. You need to understand the other person and try to act accordingly. Though you should not forget about yourself and your preferences. You need to share some of yourself so that you can connect with his/her inner-self and in the process, you might get lucky to know a bit of that person. And if you guys connect somehow, then your first date definitely gaining momentum in the positive direction. Undoubtedly, you don’t need to agree on everything. You should be upbeat with your ideology and perspectives about political, philosophical, sociological and constitutional views. If you’re feeling comfortable sharing your past, you may just do it willfully. You were vulnerable, brings out the necessary details of the other person, you are prolonging.
Sometimes silence is the best possible way to communicate with someone. It’s a beautiful yet illuminating sign of a poised and perfect relationship while both of you don’t have to worry about what to talk or not to talk. Though you have to be very careful with the idea otherwise, it will go south and ignorance will appear in the mist. You may discover yourself in the meantime while you try to discover the other person. You can also get engaged in a serious conversation in a much lighter mood and can discuss consequential and grave issues with your date without being violated. Also, it is very essential that you talk about non-verbal communication and don’t treat it as illicit. This should clear some air and free-up the whole conservation and you might become more intimate to that person.
No relationship can survive much longer on lies and falsehoods. After a quintessential time, it will come out and distort your relationship in a much vengeful manner. On the other side, you can be a bit selective and choosy about what you want to share. You might be protective about some of the details you’re not so fond of and you may not want to share at the first meeting and it should be alright at the end. If the relationship flourishes, you are bound to obtain enough time to peel those pains layer by layer. However, you might prepare a set of first date questions which you intend to perform on your first meeting with the potential partner but be ready to not to stick to the index as curiosity and inquisitiveness often lead to much more. Howbeit, never shy to discuss the subject of disarray or concern as it may cause fight or tension in the relationship. In the long run, it will portray in your favor. Eventually, the relationship itself is a very intriguing and complex arrangement. So, without hurting him/her, you can furnish an honest and sincere conversation which may open the door for a great starting for a healthy relationship.
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