Are you tired of having to put your own shoes on? Sick of picking up Fluffy’s nuggets off your one-of-a-kind Persian rug? Do you hate having to struggle with that all natural peanut butter lid? ManServants at your service.
If only you had a man who could take care of all those needs and more. Oh, you’ve got a boyfriend? Maybe even a husband. Well my guess is that he’s far from perfect. Sure he might be benevolent and easy on the eyes, but so is a Golden Retriever. Does he throw down his jacket if there’s a puddle in your way? Does he offer to act as a human chair should you find yourself seat-less at your next dinner soiree? Didn’t think so. You say you’re single? Well listen close honey, because the knowledge I’m about to drop will rock your perfectly manicured world. Listen closely…ManServants.
#thisisarealservice : “Yes Queen Yes”
Gone are the days of chivalry. Sure, every now and then some nice young gent may offer to open your door or let you slip into the cab he just hailed. But who are we kidding? This is New York baby and it’s every man, woman, child and designer dog for themselves. If only you-gorgeous, sophisticated, accomplished you-had someone who could aid in your path to fabulousness and world domination. Well ladies, someone heard the clamor and they’re ready to man up.
According to ManServants’ cheeky website, your own personal ManServant can be hired for a variety of fabulous scenarios. Going to a wedding where you’re sure to run into high school frenemies, your ex and your mother who is watching your biological baby clock tick tock? Hire an Arm Candy ManServant. He’ll show up dressed for combat in his Armani suit (remember, he’s going to war for you here) and treat you like the queen you are. He’ll dance with your mom and talk sports with your dad. Think Dermot Mulroney in The Wedding Date, only taller and not an escort.
Has all your wintertime Soul Cycling paid off and you’re ready to kill it at the pool this summer? Start saving and hire a Cabana ManServant for your next pool party in the Hamptons. He’ll bring you drinks, a wink and is guaranteed not to canon ball all over your perfect blowout.
Did your best girlfriend just get dumped? While you’re busy plotting her ex’s demise, gift her a Heartbreak ManServant to “turn her womp-fest into a celebration”. The perfect “man-tidot to her ugly cry”. (to see all their men-in-waiting options, check them out at manservants.co).
With packages, no pun intended, starting at $125 an hour, you can gift or treat yourself to an hour…or four of pampering. Whether you’re in NYC, LA or San Fran, you simply select the type of ManServant that will best suit your specific occasion and poof, he’ll appear. You even get to name him.
No I’m not joking. You can name him whatever you want.
George Clooney is coming to your Bachelorette party? You bet your sweet ass he is. You can give him an accent, have him serenade you and give you a dramatic reading of your Facebook feed to keep you up to date on how jealous all your friends are.
You can also make special requests. If you’re trying to bump up your Instagram numbers, just let them know you’ll need a man who’s good with an iPhone camera. He’ll be your own personal paparazzi all night long just to fill up your feed with photos of you looking effortlessly flawless while he coaches you on what poses make you look the most irresistible. Oh wait…that’s all of them. If you need someone who makes a mean Moscow Mule, you got it. He’ll keep your drinks topped off and your ego well fed-not to mention the added bonus of having a built-in bodyguard just in case all those self-defense classes you’ve been taking haven’t really stuck yet.
All snickering aside, the ladies at ManServants have cultivated a clever revamp of the old banana-hammock-at-the-bachelorette-party idea. Instead of cheesy, get glitzy with someone, quite literally, trained to make you and your friends feel first class.
Honestly if your Goldendoodle boyfriend gets to see you after some other guy waits on you hand and foot all day, he may sign you up for weekly sessions.
Outrageous? Maybe. Hilarious? Definitely. However, despite their clever puns and witty antics, ManServants is a very real business. The best part? They’re totally on to themselves. And they want you to get in on it too.
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photo credit: manservants.co, gansevoorthotelgroup.com, @CarlyCardellino IG
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