Shiver me Tinder…Where do I begin?
Is the cold hibernation of winter driving you to Tinder more than ever? Me too!
In all honesty, I’ve come to terms with the fact that Tinder is my best resource for online amore. Although, at first I was avid about not using social media apps. for dating purposes- especially those which seemed to be for more convenient or casual hookups than undying devotion- I found myself with limited options. Between my daily routine and my quest for love, it only makes sense that I search for my soul mate within a 20 mile radius (the farthest I’m willing to drive for a random) right? I swipe through a catalog of bachelors as they pose with tigers, take shirtless selfies in the gym mirror, all while attempting to win over my affection with ironically obscure movie quotes in their bios.
-And heaven forbid I get into a groove of swiping left where I accidentally overlooked the one who got away…My heart be still.
Plus, as I am getting older and life is moving forward, my social circle continues to get smaller. My friends are in relationships, getting married, building careers, reproducing- ya know, real adult sh*t! I go out less often and when I do, it’s more about quality time with my friends, cocktails and conversation, rather than the hunt for a potential suitor and a future Mr. F*ckboy.
Truth be told, when no one is there for me, Tinder always is.
Although, I have never actually gone on a date with anyone I have met on Tinder, I still can’t help but feel obliged to leave it open, scroll through when I’m bored, and invest wasteful minutes of my life in mundane conversations. Keep in mind that these are the guys who I have already imagined what it would be like to date for 3 years and breakup with down the line. Sick…I know.
What am I really doing it for if I’m not going to give it a true chance?
Is it for self-esteem? Is it this need to pass judgement on total strangers?
Most of the time I wind up getting annoyed at the expectations these guys impose. My attempt is to usually go in full throttle (Charlies Angel 2). Then I am quick to be reminded, they all want me to come meet them instead of the other way around, or they get creepy real fast, get mean, or jump right into something serious as if our match was binding in a court of law.
Listen, fellas, I’m sorry but the notification of your “SuperLike” was not my winning lotto ticket. It is extremely difficult to establish a connection via a few message exchanges and I’m sorry that this is weird for some of us- but it is still a relatively new “norm” us women need to get used to. Not to mention when you have access to this many singles at your literal fingertips, pursuing further exploration is inevitable and then it becomes so overboard, you are just another grain in the sand.
Funny thing is, I know more successful relationships which lead to engagements through Tinder than I do horror tales. I personally just cannot figure out how. Deep down, I know it isn’t right for me, but at the same time it’s what society is expecting me to do. I always envisioned a much more organic way of being introduced to people, but now my cell phone acts as the most happening watering hole for love to find me. I’m not quite sure what to do or how to feel about the new-wave of technology which is forcing me into a situation where I am essentially just killin’ time.