Quarterback Complex: Being the Sh*t in High School Doesn’t Mean Sh*t As An Adult

    We all know the guy…

    The guy that was the quarterback in high school and won’t let us forget it. He brags about how he got all the girls and how he took the team to championships (or was on the team when they went). The guy who at one time had the whole school chanting his name…

    We know him, and he won’t let us forget him.

    This guy is yet to realize his high school accomplishments no longer f*cking matter.

    Dude- You weren’t in the NFL, you didn’t even play in college, so why are you still holding on to something that happened nearly a decade ago?

    If you’re now questioning whether or not you’re suffering from Quarterback Complex, you most likely are if you do any of this annoying sh*t.

    You talk about high school & your ‘glory days’ every time you drink. Every. F*cking. Time.

    No more vodka for you. You’re falling all over yourself trying to bring back a moment from Remember the Titans and no one is having it.

    No. No one cares how far your drunk ass can throw a football. No one wants to start up a weekend league so you can show off your “mad skills”. Dude, you’d probably f*ck up your rotator cuff just picking up the ball. Sit your drunk ass down and quit talking.


    You keeping telling the same story over and over and over again. Enough.

    Whenever your friends start reminiscing about the good ole days, you have to bring up your trek to the playoffs or your championship game. Great! We’re all really happy for 17 year old you. Now let it f*cking go.

    Unless you’re about to tell us the f*cking Bronco’s called and said they saw what you did in high school and want you to replace Peyton, NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR IT. When your friends start mimicking your stories verbatim, you should realize you’ve told them way too many times.

     You continuously let your past success, FROM HIGH SCHOOL, be an excuse for why you suck now.

    I would love to know if your resume starts off by saying, “High School Quarterback 2003-2007”, and how many job offers you’ve gotten because of that.

    You sit around and do nothing  productive on a daily basis. You explain how your time has passed and everything is ruined because you were good enough to make the professional league, but you didn’t go. It’s your biggest regret, which is why wallowing in self-pity and drinking yourself into oblivion is seemingly acceptable.

    Whether it was an unforeseen injury, missing the cut by 1 person or screwing up your grades so that you couldn’t play longer, no one cares anymore. We cared the first 10 times you pled your, “this is why I suck at life,” case to us. We’re done now, and you should be too.

    Sh*t happens, get over it.


    You use the, “I was the Quarterback in High School”, pick up line and think it actually works.

    Unless you’re going after the shoulda-woulda-coulda- cheerleader, no one cares about your high school memories. You’re not owed anything because you were once Mr. Popularity and just because you use to play a game doesn’t mean you got game today.

    Women will laugh and reminisce with you down the road of a relationship, but they WILL NOT jump into bed with you because you’re bragging about something you did years ago. That’s not intriguing and that’s definitely not enticing. What it is, is f*cking pathetic.

    Even your bros are rolling their eyes at you.


    You think you know everything about the sport you once played because you were ‘that guy’ back in the day.

    Football changes every season. It’s annoying, the regulations are bullsh*t and the NFL is ruining the game. That being said, you don’t know everything about football!

    Stop arguing with people because you think something goes one way and it’s actually the complete opposite. Things have a tendency to change over the years. No one wants to hear the, “when I was playing, things were different”, speech over and over again. There’s nothing wrong about having a conversation about the bulls*t that goes on in profession sport; there’s nothing wrong with talking about how the game has changed, you however, HAVE NEVER PLAYED A PROFESSIONAL SPORT..

    Listen, the world isn’t trying to hate on you, but it’ time to move on. Go meet someone, breed a son, help him go pro and then you can brag all you want. Until that day comes, seek help.

    You’re suffering from #QuarterbackComplex and it’s kind of embarrassing. Grow up.


    • Tom La Vecchia

      Founder of New Theory & X Factor Media

      Founder and Publisher of New Theory Magazine and Podcast. Serial Entrepreneur who loves wine, cigars and anything that allows to people to connect and share experiences.

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