As Usher so eloquently put it, ” we want a lady in the streets, but a freak in the sheets.”
Oh Usher, I’m sure men would agree with you, but they want so much more than that.
Often guys get the rap for being vain and only wanting to be with a hot chick. Women have acquired this skewed view that if you’re not GiGi Hadid, men won’t look at you.
Guys really do care and understand- better than some women- that beauty is only skin deep.
So what do men really want?
When I asked around, the answers were shockingly heartfelt, thoughtful and enough to book the wedding for tomorrow.
Seriously, some of these guys get deep.
So ladies, brace yourselves.
Here’s what men really want when it comes to the woman they settle down with.
“I mean personally, what I want is honesty and integrity. Looks are somewhat important because you have to be attracted to someone both emotionally and physically. I think more importantly, I don’t want to guess about our status, which is what our generation loves to be vague about. I want someone who isn’t scared to show emotion, to communicate what she likes or doesn’t like. I think all men would rather the hybrid homebody type of girl. A girl that can party, but still take it easy with you, chill and bum it.
“The kind of woman I always want to keep improving for. Uhmmmm, it’s definitely more personality for me. But physical attraction also has its place. My perfect woman would have eyes I can get lost in, killer curves, a beautiful singing voice, nerdiness always helps, look dynamite in red lipstick, have a sense of humor, have goals/dreams, be an animal person, want kids, and be able to make me want her as a mother to my kids. I’m sure I can think of more…”
“So personality is the biggest thing for me. We have to mesh – goofy is always a plus. I want to have fun with this girl whenever we go out and be able to “do us” no matter who is watching. Nerdom is a bonus feature here, if there’s at least one topic we can geek out together on then I know she’s a keeper.
Style is up there for me too. If we’re going out she doesn’t have to dress for the runway but looking good out together is good. I don’t want someone who’s always okay with just throwing on a hoodie and going out every day. That’s cool now and then, but not on the regular.
Side note: one if the sexiest things a girl can wear is a fitted t shirt and jeans. Gives that down to earth but still stylish look.
Looks are obviously a factor, height doesn’t hurt either
Loyalty is probably the biggest factor here other than personality. I should be able to see that from how she interacts with her friends and family. That’s how I’ll be able to determine if I can trust her.
Her being caring, thoughtful and supportive really round this out. Without being supportive you really can’t expect to have a ‘we’ or an ‘us’; it’s going to end being very one-sided.”
-Matt F. , 28
“When it comes to a what I look for in the woman I’ll settle down with, she has to be in the same place as me with our relationship..loyalty is a huge key but also compromise..honesty and just the feeling that this is where I want to be, and I’m who she wants to be with.”
“Decisiveness, I don’t want to have to make all the decisions (like where to go, what to do) and then be critiqued when I don’t make the choice she may favor more than the other… Just tell me what you want to do, it’s okay to speak your mind!
She needs to be caring, men go through issues to, most of the time the peer group of men that surrounds us just tells us to get over it and be a man. Sometimes though, you just can’t; so it’s always nice to have someone that you know who cares, someone you can vent to and support you through your issues.
She has to be willing to do for you, the little things, you know? Ask me where I want to go after we’ve done everything you wanted to do throughout the day, and don’t make me feel bad about it! Call me just to say I love you, ( this works both ways) it means a lot to me personally that you were thinking of me and chose to let me know. Give random hugs and kisses, personally, the unexpected ones are usually the best.
Above all, just love me unconditionally and accept me for who I am, don’t judge me and wish for me to be who I’m not.”
“Well that’s pretty simple. I want a best friend as cliche as it may seem. I want someone whom after a long days work I can come home to have small talk and just hangout with. With that, of course, I want someone whom would be a good mother to my children. And respectful to my family.”
Matt S. , 24
“As a married man, what I love about my wife is, she loves God, our common interests, her heart…that, and she’s clearly a total babe.
“Loyalty. Respect. Great personality, someone you’re comfortable in front of, that you have no problem telling that person anything.Type of person you will never get bored of whether your sitting at home watching a movie and eating pounds of chinese food for 5 days straight, or going out for a few drinks with friends.Family nd Friends have to approve of the her. I need to be able to get a long with them, be able to hangout with your other like he/she is part of your group even if you’re not there. “
“She had to be super cool and really fun. Someone I could be friends with. Super attractive. Super funny. She had to be super. Found her. Now I got a kid and stuff after almost 5 wonderful years of marriage.”
“As for type of woman a guy would want to settle down with, a woman that would act like a woman. To many times woman act like little girls, and based on their mature they attract, boys that appear like men, and the girl gets heart broken over a mirror reflection of themselves and they later do it to someone else. This would imply that a girl knows the definition of a woman is. A woman who knows their proporities, and act on them would be also another plus. Just my observation is that they aren’t not willing to invest in themselves as much as they are will to invest in man.”
If these men have not restored your faith in having a faithful relationship and true romance, nothing ever will.
There are good men out there, some even as amazing as these guys, so don’t give up hope.
And that’s what men really want.