The Truth About Why Women Can’t Accept Compliments

    Women are amazing creatures. Of course I’m a little biased, being a woman and all… but, if it walks like a duck, and it sounds like a duck…guess what? Women are awesome! We work hard to look good, smell good, and present well all while kicking ass and taking names. We multi-task with an efficiency and accuracy that seems almost impossible, we are nurturers and leaders, and we are lovers and fighters. Are you guys seeing the bias here? It’s mind-blowing that all these amazing qualities can exist inside a person that is completely unable to accept a compliment!

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    You know it’s true! The last time your guy said you looked good, how did you respond? I bet I can guess. There was an eye roll followed by a huff and a comment like “these jeans make my hips look wide!” Or how about when your friend compliments you on your new promotion, and instead of feeling proud as a peacock you immediately defer and shower her with compliments about her recent successes. It’s heartbreaking that acknowledging and accepting praise is such an uncomfortable process. It should be natural and welcomed.

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    Sadly, women have been conditioned to believe that they should be modest, and being proud of your achievements or relishing in praise is conceited and boastful. But the truth is, not accepting a compliment is hurtful to not only yourself, but to the person giving the compliment! If you simply said thank you and gave your boyfriend a kiss after a compliment, you’d both feel pretty awesome! And if you thanked your friend and told her how happy you are about your professional success, you might show her how it’s okay to embrace praise!

    Everyone wants to receive compliments – it feels good! It’s amazing to be acknowledged and noticed; even if it’s something inconsequential like styling your hair differently or making a nice dinner. So here’s the conundrum, women want to be complimented, but they don’t want to receive the compliments! What a mess! How about this, let’s just agree that saying thank you without putting yourself down is how everyone – male or female- should receive a compliment! Make a conscious effort to simply smile and say thank you. Think of how that simple act could inspire others!  And always remember, the person complimenting you is being truthful and genuine, and you should acknowledge that praise at the very least as a way to bond and connect with that person.

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    The best compliments are always by the people closest to you. Even celebrities, who get compliments all the time, appreciate genuine praise from their nearest and dearest. In an interview with People, Selena Gomez revealed that the greatest compliment she ever received was from her best friend Ashley. She said, “My best friend Ashley complimented me on how I treat people, which is the biggest compliment someone can give me. She always knows how to say the right thing.” It got me thinking about what the best compliment someone ever gave me was. It’s hard to pinpoint just one thing, but if I had to it would be when my mom told me I was the strongest person she knew. It felt great. We all need to accept compliments a little better.

    What’s the best compliment you ever received?

     

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